i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Randomize
