I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Randomize
