Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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