just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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