do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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