evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize