so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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