This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I have fence marks all over my body
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
