You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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