There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize