whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
