If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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