and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize
