I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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