Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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