4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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