Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
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