How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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