He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
