so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
