if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
