So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
