WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize