Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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