Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
