i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I feel great
I just peed on a car
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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