no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
