You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Randomize
