yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Randomize
