Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Randomize
