I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize