What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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