I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
