Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
