In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Randomize
