Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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