i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Send help, water and tortillas.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
