i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
You're a waste of cheezeits
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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