And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Randomize
