Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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