I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
