At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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