Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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