I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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