Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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