I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
