New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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