Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
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