bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
