clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
