absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Randomize
