he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
so let's talk penis.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Floor bacon is actually really good
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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